Difference between Korean and Japanese

Source: O Son-fa. “Wind of the skirt”

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  • Korean and Japanese are apt to forget they are foreigners to each other, because the race is similar to each other. You must not forget they are foreigners for each other even if they looks similar.
  • In 2007 and 2013, Ms. Son-fa O, commonly known as her Korean name Oh Seon-hwa, was refused entry to South Korea. This is because Korea has a customary law that Korean must not criticize Korean in other countries. What a stupid refusal! She just tried to compare the Japanese with the Korean purely. From the viewpoints of other countries, Korea is against common sense.
  • Park Yu-ha, the professor who studied so-called comfort women was prosecuted. And Lee Byeong-su, the scholar of Korean ancient history was indicted for the reason that his books were against the desirable Korean history. In Korea, you must not forget the foreign common sense does not work.

1.Self‐assertion
Korean Japanese
They have strong self-assertion. They want to be proud of themselves. They are modest. They avoid to show off their power.
When a Korean woman was asked why she did not marry in the United States, a Korean boy student interrupted it and said “because she is ugly.”
In Korea, that is a light banter in the friendly relationship, but he did not know that in the other countries it is not treated as a joke.
Korean has strong own culture-centered awareness and is lacking in the consideration for other cultures.
They are going to go along with others. So they rarely give their opinions strongly.
They like strong expressions. The intense conflicts are daily occurrences.
They want to make anything clear. They say anything clearly by extremely direct expression.
They like vague expressions such as “It may not be that I don’t think so”.
They say Yes or No clearly.
They demand talks to make their confrontation clear.
They like the middle in disfavor with extreme. They like “ambiguous nature”.
They demand talks to relax confrontation.
When you buy medicine at a drugstore; Korean pharmacist asserts, “This medicine will cure you”. Japanese pharmacist says, “If this medicine does not cure you, please go to the hospital”.
When you invite Korean to a meal and ask “What do you want to eat?,” they answer, “I want to eat ○○”. When you invite Japanese to a meal and ask “What do you want to eat?,” they answer “anything is all right. I entrust you”. Because they worry that the meal they say they want to eat may be what you don’t like.
They like No. 1 in anything. When Japan built “Sunshine 60,” they built “63 building”. They like No. 1 too, but they have very little interest in Korean things.
They try to emphasize their predominance, express that and make the difference between others clear.
The beautiful woman tries to attract attention.
They worry that when their predominance becomes public, the balance with others may collapse. So they try to express normal as much as possible.
The beautiful woman hates to stand out.
They say their economic growth shows their racial excellence.
They emphasize, “I made efforts and I developed my company”.
They say that while they worked hard, they accomplished economic growth before they even realized that.
They say, “We could develop our company thanks to you everybody.”

2.Personal relations, hierarchy
Korean Japanese
When you do something bad and you are scolded, your posture to hear what the partner says silently expresses your feeling of “I’m sorry”. They do not say “I’m sorry”. If you do not say “I’m sorry,” they feel no sign of your regret for what you did.
The technological work such as massager is considered the work of the lowest person. Massager is called “teacher”.
They say, “This is a difficult book, but I think it’s very helpful because my teacher let me read.”
Hierarchy is made by having a lead over the others, and their emulousness is stimulated.
They say, “My teacher let me read this book. It may be difficult for me to understand.”
They use expressions that the difference with the others is not clear.
They directly make a stance such as “I will let you have a help”.
The helped persons think that it is natural that a person with the power helps the helped ones and they thank for that. but they do not feel the burden of feeling, “I am sorry”.
The helped persons insist on how they are worth being helped. Therefore, they do not show the modest attitude.
They think one-sided help hurts the pride of the helped persons and it is rude. So they offer a help saying “Can I help you if you like?”
The helped persons thank the helpers and feel the burden of feeling “I am sorry” and take a modest attitude.
They try to approach the partner and make friends.
They pick up the food in the side dish of the lunch of the classmate with chopsticks and put it in their mouths.
They go to the house of their friends and open the refrigerator without permission and take out juice.
It is rude that they take a visitor style when they go to the house of their friend. It is good to behave as if they were in their own house.
It is rude that they pick up the food in the side dish of the lunch of the classmate and put it in their mouths without permission.
They think it is overly friendly and unpleasant that they open a refrigerator without permission even if they are friends.
“Korea is just like the elder brother who conveyed culture for Japan since the ancient times. Therefore it is natural that Japan the younger brother helps Korea now”. The country that receives help should say “We want your help”.
When they find a troubled person, they help the partner positively. It might be meddlesome or the high‐pressure selling of kindness. They try to show that they have power than the partner and they are superior to the partner. In Korea if you help someone, you stand on the helped person and the person stands below you. They want to make their hierarchy clear. They think they want to teach someone, but they think of the partner at first. They think it is rude for the partner that they help the partner on account of themselves. Because they think that seems as if that puts them on the upper position and makes them look down on the partner.
They like to teach many times more than to learn. This is because they can stand on the others by teaching. They like to learn than to teach.
By the tradition since the Yi Dynasty Korea period, they make much of cliquism.
They begin with the story of the educational background when they meet a stranger.
They avoid that they are proud of the university they graduated.
They ask hometown to a stranger.
They often give the expensive presents. They only want that the partner understand that it’s expensive.
The present given in return gives the unpleasant feeling to them, because it means offset of the present.
When you violate traffic regulations, generally you are forgiven if you give money to a police officer. The bribe is prosperous.
They give a present in return when they get a present.
There is nobody who gives money to a police officer when they violate traffic regulations.

3.Male-female relationships, gender gap
Korean Japanese
Married couple does not say “thank you,” “I’m sorry” or “please ・・・” to each other. It is not necessary because they understand each other well.
“There is no courtesy in friendly relation"
Even a married couple says “thank you,” “I’m sorry” or “please ・・・” to each other.
Do not forget decorum in familiarity.
Husband and wife are one flesh. It is courtesy to say their own family low and outsiders high.
When somebody says “your wife is very beautiful,” the husband says “not really. she is not so brighter”.
The man chats up the woman he likes many times. The woman gives a dirty look, refuses and ignores him many times to make herself look attractive. The man invites her persistently and calmly many times. The woman permits him after irritating him for a long time. If a man chats up a woman and is refused, he never chats up her.
At a restaurant, the women of a middle-age and an old age do the work at the back.
There is no snack bar where an old woman manages. They think women of middle-age or above can not “attract a man” and those women are not worthy of female.
The women of a middle-age and an old age carry dishes, too.
There are snack bars where old women manage. Guests say that the manageress has charms to “attract a man”.
The birth ratio of male to female in 2002 is approximately 110:100. It exceeds 104-107:100 that is said to be biological normal level. There are much abortions, because it is demanded that the woman gives birth to a boy. It was good to give birth to a boy in old days. It’s not now.


4.Friendship
Korean Japanese
When you go out to eat with your Korean friend and the friend treats you and you say “thank you,” the friend feels unpleasant. For Korean, the friend is the relationship not to need the hesitation without having a secret each other. “Thank you” means a formal relation and ignores the friendship. When they go out to eat with their friend and the friend treats them, they say “thank you”.
Even if a Japanese businessman says that he is busy, a Korean friend who has an account with the Japanese comes over to the home. It’s natural that the friend takes the burden on the partner and the friend puts a burden on the partner. They try to avoid feeling a burden each other.
When they put a burden on the partner, they feel a burden.
They feel the Korean action is “the high‐pressure selling of kindness” or “none of your business”.

5.Business
Korean Japanese
They say “no” clearly for business. They don’t say “no” clearly for business. Because they want the affinity with the person and they think that refusal of the business is refusal of the partner.
They think that it’s natural the labor union lets the company pay the salaries of the specialists of the union.
There is no worker’s pride.
They are proud of being a manager, but they are not proud of being a worker.
It is impossible because of workers’ pride that the labor union lets the company pay the salaries of the specialists of the union.
When you are unable to make a decision at the time of shopping, a salesclerk follows you, suggests something, deliberately speaks badly of you in your hearing and says “Why do you not buy it early?”
You are booed at your back when you leave the shop without buying.
When you are unable to make a decision at the time of shopping, a salesclerk does not follow you and suggest something. Sometimes a salesclerk may think about what is good with you.
The salesclerk bows and thanks you even if you leave the shop without buying.
They add a difference to service by a customer.
They contact the poor-looking person and the fellow countryman insultingly, but give considerate service to rich foreigners or the persons in socially high position.
When a Korean asks for an exchange in a hotel, they give a dirty look, but when a white person asks, they write the receipt too and hand it though it is not asked.
Even if you say “I’d like this one” in a shop, salesclerks do not stop chattering, but when the woman who wear a mink coat speaks to them, they stop chattering and walk to her.
They deal with any customers with a smile.
In a Japan-Korea joint venture, they think the relations with the partner are just like those of a brother-in-law. The contract relations are the almost same as friend relations.
It is natural that Japanese side helps a Korean side for the present, because Japan has more power than Korea. In reality, the Japanese side bears a risk after all.
They consider it is a “Korean one-sided dependence” and think “How impudent Koreans are!”.
The president contacts employees in a resolute manner. If the president worried about them and contacted them with careful words politely, they would behave like children and they would not set things to rights. The employees do not want to be treated equally, either. Because top and bottom relations would disappear and they couldnot bring themselves to work properly. The president cares about employees and copes by careful words politely.
After a Japanese president invited his Korean driver to his house and served a meal, the driver did not obey him.
“The history of a company” uses many pages to the biography of the president. “History of a company” is objective history of company.
When the president of the restaurant comes there, the employees show respect for the president, leaving customers out. Even if the president of the restaurant comes there, the employees act up to “customers first”.
They launch business because they want to be a president. Therefore there are many companies going bankrupt immediately. They launch small business for independence.
When they fail in business and go bankrupt, they can not have any help from others except their family. When they fail in business and go bankrupt, the people around them encourage them and give power to the fresh start.
The president comes before the company.
They hate teaching their know-how to other employees. They feel big prides in “nothing works when they are not there”. Therefore, if you do an inquiry to a company, the company sometimes answers “I do not know because the person in charge is not here”.
The company comes before the president.
Even if the person in charge is not there, they have the system that another person can answer. In Korea, this system is not adopted, because such a system decreases the value of the expertise that each Korean has.
Korean are apt to avoid “difficult, dirty, and dangerous” work. Because they feel ashamed that they enter such a profession, and they cannot have confidence in such a profession.
If a primary schoolchild say “I want to be a cook in the future,” the parents knock such a thought into shape. Even now sense of value that an engineer is lowly exists since the Yi Dynasty Korea period. The future dreams of the primary schoolchildren are “I want to be a taxi driver” or “I want to be a cook” or “I want to be a beautician,” etc.
They had a splendid ceramics technology in the Age of Three Kingdoms of Korea, but they are not handed down now.
They say that Japanese took ceramicists away, but this is actually because Korean did not respect the engineer.
They respect the engineer.
The engine of “pony” made by Hyundai Motors was license production of Mitsubishi Motors, but they say, “This has been developed uniquely by us.”.
There is no shop to continue business for generations. The shopkeepers think that the value of their professions is small and low, and they are not going to make their children to take over their professions. They wish their children get better work. It becomes the pride of the shop to continue business for generations.

6.Preference, courtesy, virtue
Korean Japanese
They like bright primary colors. They like light intermediate colors.
The man wears a showy tie. The woman wears the blouse that has plenty of three primary colors.
The quiet clothes have the impression of “a narrow-minded person”.
They wear many quiet clothes.
The hostess wears strong makeup and wraps the body in the clothes of a showy color. She feels that it is the sex appeal as a woman. The hostess wears the clothes of a light color and a quiet color.
Business card of the prefectural governor is made of paper of the highest grade. The mark with gold leaf is pushed on it. It is the luxurious thing. The letters have the dignified handwriting style that is written by Indian ink. The business card of the prefectural governor is made of thin and poor quality of paper. It has neither the gold leaf nor the letters in India ink.
They eat rice with a spoon with putting a bowl below. They hold a bowl in a hand and eat rice with chopsticks.
The newscaster does not laugh.
It’s because of Korean tradition. The persons belonging to the governing classes in the Yi Dynasty Korea did not do a fake smile and they always contacted a person in a resolute manner. It was their virtue.
The newscaster laughs and grieves. They show or express their feeling or opinions.
The fashion world in Seoul just adopts the fashion in Paris, and does not have a relation with the Korean traditional culture.
They receive the outside unconditionally and gradually lose their own culture.
The fashion world in Tokyo is affected by the fashion in Paris, but it has Japanese-style.
While they receive the outside, they mix it with their own culture.
“I’m busy” has bad meaning. If a Japanese says “I’m working busily thank to you” in Korea, it’s terrible. It means “I’m busy because of you”. “I’m busy” has good meaning. They often say “I’m busy thanks to you”. They feel joy in a busy situation.

7.Thoughts, religions
Korean Japanese
They call their country “fatherland” in English. Korea is paternal authority society. They call their country “motherland” in English. Japan has the values and the culture in maternal authority society.
There are many Christians. Korean Christianity has a Confucianism-like ethic. There are few Christians. The Japanese culture accepts anything. It absorbs Taoism, Confucianism, Buddhism and Christianity.
At the funeral service, the chief mourner shows sorrow and can not stop almost bursting cry and the tears. They may employ persons specializing in lamentation.
They share sorrow with the persons around them and try to break off sorrow, even just a little.
The chief mourners rarely show sorrow and they may have a smile in their faces.
They try to break off their sad feeling inside them and not to trouble the people around them. They try to avoid to expose only their feelings and to stand alone from other people.
The clergyman says, “I will pray for you”. He never say, “Let me pray”. Because “Let me pray” means that he tries to receive the permission of praying. They feel it to be feeble and cannot trust the clergyman. The clergyman says, “Let me pray, please.”
Nobody speaks to a flower. Some speaks to a flower.

8.Language
Korean Japanese
When Korean managers fire a worker, they say, “I’ll let you leave the company”. They never say “I want you to leave the company”. Because it sounds as if the manager asks a favor of the worker. Strong self-expression is a characteristic of Korean language. Japanese managers say “I want you to leave the company”.
They say “somebody is peeping in,” but they don’t say “I am looked in by somebody”.
“Somebody is peeping in” leads to the claim of “Stop peeping!”.
They say both “somebody is peeping in” and “I am looked in by somebody”.
“I am looked in by somebody” leads to the claim of “Be careful”.
When a Korean is going to take a taxi but another person has taken the taxi, the Korean says, “that person has taken the taxi”. The words criticize the person. They say, “The taxi has been taken by that person”. They think of their vexation that they fell behind a person.
Most of the verb don’t have passiveness form. Because they feel feeble about the passiveness form, they don’t use the expression that make themselves feeble. They don’t say “My coffee has been drunk by him”. They say “Mr. Lee has drunk my coffee.” They use a lot of passiveness form. They say “My coffee has been drunk by him”.
At a grocer they say, “give me a good Chinese cabbage”.
In a hair salon they say, “Please clean my hair”. It is one of greetings that express close friendship.
“Please clean my hair” gives the beautician an unpleasant impression that they don’t trust specialty of the beautician, because it is a matter of course that a beautician cleans the hair.
When Korean buys furniture and salesclerks carry furniture to the room, Korean says, “Oh, be careful there. Don’t damage it.” They think “Oh, be careful there. Don’t damage it” shows behaving arrogantly.
They speak honorific language to their family too. They speak honorific language to outside persons, but they don’t speak it to their family.

9.Korean actions to Japanese
Japanese are under Korean. Japanese are the existence to always beg Korean’s forgiveness.
The Japanese who bought a car made in Korea went to “the consumers center” in Seoul to talk about the car trouble, but he was said “Japanese should apologize for the Japanese rule of Korea for 36 years, before complaining”.
They think that they must tell Japanese that “the person who should be under Korean must be under Korean,” and they say “the rule by Japan for 36 years” so often.
When a Japanese bought a service of shoe polishing in Seoul, the shoe‐shiner demanded money that is several times higher than the first the shoe‐shiner said. The shoe‐shiner said to Japanese, “because Japanese did a bad thing in the past, the money will be natural”.
In souvenir shops, they set the price for many times their face value. They think it is natural to take money from Japanese highly. The thinking that an individual is different from ancestors or the country will not pass in Korea.
Even if Japanese side suffers a loss because of the responsibility of the Korean side for business, they think that it is natural.
It is difficult to sing Japanese songs in Korea. Japan is not something except the evil. If a Korean insists on good of Japan even a little, he/she is labeled the betrayer.
Some Koreans respect Japan and say they like Japan personally, but being “anti-Japan,” talking “anti-Japan” and the emotional expression of “anti-Japan” are Korean custom. In Korean language, Japanese is “Ilbon Salam,” but in their conversation Korean often expresses it as “Ilbon Nom”. “Nom” is a word equivalent to “cuss” or “bozo”.
A comparison of barbarian Japan vs. cultured person Korea is talked about in many places of the textbooks. The textbook has a lot on the history of the rule by Japan in Korea, but it does not have the fact that Korea invaded Japan at the time of Mongolian Invasions.
They think that Japan did economic development because Japan took up Korean good culture and the Korean War contributes to that.
When they think about why the economic development of Korea was late, they demand a cause from Japan without investigating their own responsibility. Japan becomes a suitable target when they try to shift the responsibility to other shoulders.

10.Japanese actions to Korean
There are many Japanese who personally apologize to Korean for “the Japanese rule of Korea for 36 years”.
Japanese hate to be opposed to a person and try to get along with a partner to avoid confrontation.

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